TL;DR: Don’t deal with them. Not your job.
Growing up, my dad had a special term that he used occasionally. Lowlifes. He would point out terrible parking jobs that deprived others of a parking space. He would point out litter on the street. Perhaps someone left a pile of library books on the table when they should have put them back where they belonged. He would shake his head in disgust and mutter, “lowlifes”. I understood that he was condemning these people as thoughtless fellow citizens who needed to be set straight.
As I got older, I realized that there are lowlifes and there are also people out there who are so lacking in consciousness that you wonder how they have survived three or more decades of life. These people wreak havoc everywhere they go and sabotage all of their relationships. They resort to gaslighting and emotional abuse of the highest order when they don’t win arguments. They have it in their heads that their very survival depends on being right all the time. When they cheat on their partners, their non-apology involves receiving assurance that the partner will view their actions as justified. When they ruin special events like wedding receptions due to their violent, drunken behavior, they blame someone else for their actions – even the host of the event who tries to nicely bring up their grievances. Black is white and white is black – you are the crazy one for noticing that something is “off”.
In my mid-twenties, I became entangled with some people who could definitely be referred to as “lowlifes” or “low-consciousness individuals”. It happened though a relationship with someone who was not a lowlife. I sort of had no choice but to know them, and I kept giving them the benefit of the doubt. I forgave them when they tearfully apologized to me for sending hurtful DM’s, and I never brought it up again. Over the years, the situation went from uncomfortable to uncontrollable dumpster fire. A tragic turn of events led to a horrifying hate campaign against me, complete with death threats. I was shell-shocked. It was the cruelest, most vile and incomprehensible thing that had happened to anyone I had known. Where was their dignity? Why did they wake up and choose misery every day? When I had more or less recovered from that situation, I was left wondering how on earth I had consented to those connections for so long. I even went through some self-loathing for not cutting them off at the first red flag. It’s funny how lightworkers are the first to examine their actions to see where they went wrong in a situation where they were clearly victimized.
I can see now that the decision I made to love these people unconditionally was not a good or bad one. It was just a decision that is not judged one way or the other by the Divine. There are a number of choices we can make about any challenge, and we always gain wisdom if we are aware and kind to ourselves. Through it all, we are loved and supported mightily by the Divine.
I had been a bright-eyed spiritual seeker who wanted to be a guiding light to everyone. I had seen these people as a challenge – I must be patient, compassionate, and present for them no matter what. Well, I had a tough lesson to learn there. Many lightworkers go through this situation. They feel that part of their soul contract involves staying on the highest vibration possible while dodging the slings and arrows that psychopaths send them while they have access to them. Here’s what I know now. Nobody is entitled to your energy if they have proven themselves to be harmful to your health. I would go further and say that nobody is entitled to your energy period – not even good people. These people can be blood relatives, in-laws, and caregivers that you are ‘indebted’ to. You are allowed – no – you are strongly encouraged – deeply urged – to establish boundaries. You are not a bad person for caring about your self-preservation. It is only by preserving yourself that you can be a guiding light to people who are in your vibrational vicinity. People in your vibrational vicinity are primed and ready for a bump in awareness. They are not psychopaths who seek a supply for their need for drama. The people in your vibrational vicinity need you to love yourself enough to stay healthy.You would not be able to help them if you sacrificed yourself for narcissists who were a lost cause from Day One.
There is another type of loco out there. I think that most of us have been graced by the presence of internet trolls. Sometimes, their insults are so shocking, our first reaction is laughter – not even indignant laughter – they are genuinely making fools of themselves. These people regularly instigate fights in social media groups, and they seem to have no shame about their conduct. They clearly aren’t considering what potential employers or romantic partners would think of their ugly words. They are unloading all of their darkness onto the internet where it will remain forever – long past their physical deaths – an enduring reminder of their personalities. Many of us lightworkers take it upon ourselves to educate them in the most tactful and loving way possible. It never puts the fire out. You can’t reason with people who are so fully identified with their egos that they will defend themselves in long threads until no one responds anymore. They will view their final word as a victory. Let them be lone victors long before anyone has wasted their time playing ping pong on a thread. People like that have no intellectual curiosity or empathy. They are not in your vibrational vicinity. Many of them are on the Cluster B spectrum, and they are not capable of changing. Block them and move on. Good riddance.
Please heed my advice. Disengage permanently at the first red flag. A red flag is a red flag. No, it can’t change colors. Your LOA magic wand isn’t capable of turning that red flag into a green flag. You are not here to use your high vibration to keep looking at a bad thing and trying to feel good about it. I say this with great compassion, because I was SO that person. Your vibration can only remain high if you choose to look at things that make you feel good. That often means that you need to take a right turn and drive on the more scenic route (think the PCH). It’s silly to continue driving on the ugly route while trying to convince yourself that maybe you need to perceive it differently. Just get on the scenic route. If they want to continue taking the ugly route, let them. You are not bad for letting them make their own decisions. Perhaps their soul contract involves traversing a dark path for reasons you can’t comprehend right now. Just let it be. It’s really none of your business. And your decision to disengage doesn’t require a lengthy explanation. “No” is a complete sentence. “Bye” is a complete sentence.
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